Achieving Focus

 Focus. “Pay attention to what you’re doing” is a common phrase spoken by parents, teachers, and employers alike. Their good intentions bent on ensuring the outcome meets their expectations.

But wait! What does it really mean to be focused?? As a kid, no matter how much I would focus on the thought, I still could never make that thing go away. Focus, when presented as simply thought (obsession) and directed on a desire or wish can lead to anxiety. That is a non-desirable outcome.

Applied to my own life right now, focus means striping away things that are no longer relevant or important to me. Focus, when practiced in a healthy way is an action not a thought. Removing belongings, habits, routines, and even people that get in the way of and compete with my attention on what is most important to me, right now is the best use of focus. It’s interesting to note that when we are young (under 40) we tend to want to do more. More is everything. More is the epitome of success and inner happiness. Then we reach a tipping point where more no longer serves us, when in fact more simply muddies our intentions and distracts us from the “real” focus of our current life. (I use the reference of “current” simply because we tend to re-invent ourselves many times over a lifetime and the result of reinvention is often a new focus will emerge in each stage)

I’m at that stage now of realizing there are things around me that only distract from what I value right now. So, I’ve begun to first streamline and reduce my commitments. Learning to say “no” is hard. You feel like you’re letting them down, but really if you don’t say no you end up letting yourself down and really in the end who’s life are you living? So yes, its time to say no.  Next I’ve discovered I’ve become more selective of the things I chose to bring into my life. It’s funny how society labels this type of behaviour negatively when in fact it’s a sign of intellectual maturity. And its only available to those who have lived a few or more decades of life experience. Life experience, whether we are consciously aware or not, is the most valuable commodity we have to offer each other. But that’s a blog for another day.

So back to streamlining my routine; I’ve removed things that did not contribute to my current most important goal/need. I’ve restructured my daily schedule and given more time to my creative output and thought processes. Yes. Give yourself time to think. Just sitting or walking and thinking. Its important to process stuff. But don’t obsess. See paragraph two.

I also have plans to go thru my stuff and free myself of things that just sit around because I think one day I might need them. Really truly after 50yrs and that “one day” has not arrived, its likely time to let someone else put them on a shelf.

For some like me, focus doesn’t happen easily. Even while writing this, I’m thinking about; what I wrote yesterday, how I need to do X Y Z sometime today, looks like the weather might be nice, oh yeah I need to put that thing away…. When you have my brain there’s a whole lot of chatter all the time, everyday. As a grade school student, I thought I was so smart because I was able to screen out all the classroom noise and uber-focus on my work. This one simple skill provided me with good grades and the ability to get things done, albeit I was painfully socially awkward, lacked confidence and spent most of my time alone. Many, many, many years later I would learn that actually it was a behaviour attributed to my personality disorder. Regardless, it served me at a time when it was needed. I admit I still do access that skill when I’m in a noisy crowded environment if I cannot avoid the situation by leaving.

Overall, accessing our ability to focus on the important stuff  > in our own lives< – that part being super important – and streamlining our daily lives by removing that which no longer serves us can be a freeing experience that brings us closer to the things we value most.