Resistance is Futile

I reset my schedule back to a 5am wake up time so I could have the cats fed, my coffee made, my brain awake by a 6am start in the studio. Of course, you all know, because you read yesterdays post, that my first act of the day is to write. And even though this is day two of a commitment made merely 24hrs ago, there was resistance.

But where does the resistance come from? Great question! It’s likely different for each of us and likely stems from something in the past; a parent, an employer, a coach….  Some of us have a stronger need to forge out own path and we also tend to have greater resistance to things that we can perceive as difficult, painful, or not worth doing.  But our judgements are based on past experiences which are likely not true in our present, yet we cling to them anyway because we haven’t been able to replace those ideas and emotions with anything better. Yet. 

My own personal resistance most often stems from a false belief “what’s the point” and the always familiar “who will care?”. Both of these come from a deeper feeling of unworthiness which is a type of imposter syndrome. That annoying voice was once the dominant voice that overruled everything I ever attempted. Self defeating and often alienating it interfered with my progress as a person. I’m not confident that I will entirely remove that voice. Its like a deeply rooted plant. But I can refuse to water it nor give it light. I can continue to cut it down when it tries to push through the soil. I’ve planted lots of hopeful seeds around it, to choke it out. I know that it does show through my work occasionally and most of the time, only I can see it.

So, what is the point? I think that most of us can agree that the general purpose of life is to bring joy to others. Its really vague. Which is great because the interpretations of bringing joy to others are nearly endless. My auto mechanic will bring joy to me when he fixes my hatchback next week, because then I’ll be able to drive it without it sounding like a diesel truck. My hairdresser will bring me joy by cutting back my hair, so I look somewhat presentable again during my upcoming art show. And for me, creating my art, my paintings bring joy to others when they see the work and smile and gasp with happiness. And that experience for me, brings joy because then I understand the value of the work.

When I forget the point and listen to the annoying voice I come upon resistance. So, I dig deep and sometimes resistance wins and other times I move forward. I saw a talk that provided a work around for resistance. The speaker explained that if we count backwards from 3 or 5 (I actually don’t remember the number) when we experience resistance and then just start that thing that the resistance will almost always dissipate. Another saying I’ve heard is that if the task will take less than 2 minutes, just do it, don’t leave it for later because then it becomes a greater task and stronger resistance.

I don’t have the science, but I feel that resistance is part of our fight, flight or freeze response that is deeply rooted in our ancient DNA.  And in that case, its useful because it keeps us alive. However, in our modern day lives its very unlikely most of us encounter life-threatening events every day, so while the ancient response is still there its not as useful as it once was and can often interfere with our modern life.

Resistance is not futile unless we allow it to flow over and around us stitching us into a cocoon. Our task is to recognize when resistance is holding us back from moving forward, to reset our inner voices and overcome resistance. Then we can continue doing the work that matters to us, and to others.